


Operation: "Don't-get-eaten-while-saving-the-Princess"

by Gismo070



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Alya is no damsel in distress, Chat is a big kitten that only wants pets, Jason's an ass, Nino didn't sign up for this shit, One Shot, Sensitive Hawk Moth, Villain Lair Aesthetic is strong with this one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-15
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2019-01-17 22:55:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12375855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gismo070/pseuds/Gismo070
Summary: Nino is a squire that accompanies the knight Jason on a quest to rescue the Princess Alya from the sorcerer Hawk Moth.





	Operation: "Don't-get-eaten-while-saving-the-Princess"

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fan-made story! Miraculous Ladybug is owned by Thomas Astruc and Zag Heroez. Please support the official release.

 

The clicking of claws against stone reverberated throughout the hallway as the beast of destruction approached the young couple. After avoiding the demon the entire time, Nino was certain he could get in, rescue the princess, get out, go home, become a knight, simple plan right?

Wrong.

Especially if this demon cat had anything to say about it.

Either way the young squire was screwed. His princess companion on the other hand didn’t seemed phased at all by their impending doom as she stared death down and challenged the beast to make its move.

It was at this moment that Nino wondered how the hell he got himself into this situation, with an infuriatingly stubborn princess and a monster about to make a meal out of him.

_-three months ago-_

“Be a knight he said! It’d be easy he said! WELL THIS ISN’T EASY FATHER!!!” Nino growled out as he raked more hay out of Lord Barbot’s stables. The Lord’s brother was the knight that the young squire was training under, a righteous ass he was. “Stupid knights and their stupid horses. Not you Chestnut, your cool.”

Being the youngest son meant that Nino would not be able to inherit his families land, meaning there was no real future for him in the land-owning business. His father of course pushed him into knighthood in hopes of his son making some money and strengthening the family name.

Nino reluctantly agreed to this. Two years later and he was finally a squire, which was better than a page he guessed, but still he wanted to be a knight already. He was willing to do anything if it meant getting away from Sir Jason.

After cleaning up the stables and feeding the steeds who lived there, Nino ventured off to the nearby village to pick up some fresh fruit and bread. Even as a squire, he was still Sir Jason’s errand boy.

The village was normally quiet and tranquil but today something was off. The citizens were a buzz, people running back and forth in what seems to be complete panic. Nino walked over to a flower vendor whose manager was Rose, a girl that quickly befriended him when he first arrived two years ago.

“Yo dudette what’s going on? It looks like everyone is running around with their heads chopped off or something…”

“Oh that. A rumor is stirring up trouble all over the land, not just here. Apparently the Princess Alya was kidnapped by the evil sorcerer Hawk Moth. This set everyone into a panic, were all worried about the princess’ safety.”

‘ _The princess is in trouble… well that can’t be good_.’ Nino had the pleasure of meeting the princess at the beginning of his knightly studies and could say for a fact that she was one of the strongest willed individuals that he every came across. How someone could kidnap her was beyond him. ‘ _That poor wizard is probably having to deal with her constant sass… hopefully she doesn’t say anything that will get her killed_.’

_-In a faraway evil lair dungeon_

_(because Hawk Moth is a classy villain and needs to maintain his evil aesthetic)-_

“Yo Trash Moth! When am I getting out of here? For real man, this place stinks! Have you heard of a thing called a broom? Because no joke, the dust bunnies in here have dust bunnies of their own!”

“Why again did I kidnap this one again? Oh, that’s right, taking over the kingdom…” Hawk Moth face palmed as another insult was hurled at him from the dungeon. Jeez that girl is _loud_. Maybe he should threaten her with the guard cat again? That always did the trick when it came to silencing unruly prisoners.

“And for the record I would rather be eaten by that satanic cat then sit in this dump of a lair. I could literally knit a _sweater_ with all of the cobwebs in my cell alone!” Oh, did he say that last part out loud. Hawk Moth was really starting to hate this princess more and more.

He tries so hard to maintain the lair’s aesthetic just to have her dis all his hard work. For instance, do you know how hard it is to install a giant butterfly window on the top floor of a tower? Really hard that’s how, but he did it anyway in the name of looking cool! (That and the view was amazing from up there.) He even went through the hassle of stealing the witch Ladybug’s familiar and turning it into his monstrous guard cat because lava filled moats aren’t badass enough for this swanky lair, no sire!

And all her hate was really starting to hurt his feelings, but since he is an evil sorcerer on a quest of gaining ultimate power, he decides not to cry about how mean she was being (plus Chat Noir would never let him hear the end of it if his master, the sorcerer of corruption, was crying because of some little girl’s insults).

_-back in the adventures of Nino trying not to stab Jason for being an insufferable jerk-_

The King, being the reasonable individual that he is (after a small mental breakdown over the loss of his eldest daughter), gathered all the knights of the land and sent them on a quest to the south kingdom where Hawk Moths very swanky villainous lair was rumored to be. And that of course meant that Sir Jason was summoned to join them, and where ever Sir Jason goes, Nino (very reluctantly) goes.

The young squire was by no means looking forward to charging an evil lair to rescue a princess (ok maybe he was because that adventure sounds awesome). But what he really, really, _really_ , wasn’t looking forward to was all of the traveling it took just to get to the lair in the first place! Like couldn’t Hawk Moth live somewhere closer to home, or at least somewhere that wasn’t a bug invested spooky forest in the middle of nowhere. It took two months ( ** _two months!_** ) just to reach said spooky forest, and by this time most knights already got tired and left to go do knightly things somewhere else.

Nino was not jealous of the other squires who got to call it quits with their teachers and gallop off to god knows where (he was totally jealous), and he was defiantly not jealous of Sir Jason who got to sit all high and mighty upon his gallant white steed while Nino had to walk half the time because the pack mule could only carry so much (he was green with envy). The only upside was that Nino could play music while they traveled, the down side to that was all the songs he played _had_ to be about Sir Jason’s _greatness_.

If they didn’t get to the fortress of butterflies soon he was going to lose his marbles. Nino did not sign up for this.

_-back in swank town-_

After nearly a week of waiting for word from the King about the ransom for the Princess, Hawk Moth could no longer stand her insufferable complaining. Her sass seemed to be contagious because even the normally obedient Chat Noir seemed to roll his eyes and snort at the sorcerer when the beast caught him monologuing. Dumb demon cat, the little traitor had the nerve to get all buddy buddy with the princess and all because she pets him.

Well fine then! He didn’t need that stupid cat’s approval or anything! He was a strong independent butterfly who needed no familiar. He was better off without that cat in the first place.

Wanting to get as far away from the Princess as possible, he decided to lock her up in the high tower where she could appreciate his beautiful window and hopefully change her mind about his decorating skills. (“Not cleaning up cobwebs doesn’t count as decorating you idiot,” she sassed one afternoon. Chat’s head resting on her lap, her gentle rubbing and administrations causing a continuous purr to rumble from the beast.)

That was the day he threw her up in the tower, the demon cat following on her tail, determined to continue his cat nap. That was the day when Hawk Moth lost his only companions in this huge mansion of a lair. Now he knew how Ladybug felt.

_-outside swank town-_

“OH MY GOD FINIALLY!!!” Nino shouted as they reached the drawbridge of the mansion. “WE’RE HERE!!!” Sir Jason nimbly leapt down from his stallion and clamped his hand over the excited squire’s mouth to silence the boy.

“Silence you bumbling fool, do thou can to revealith our location to thy enemy.” Sir Jason scolded as he released Nino from his grasp. Nino never understood why the knight would always speak like that. It was an annoying yet slightly endearing trait and yet _NO ONE ELSE SPOKE LIKE THAT_! Sometimes the squire just wanted to smack some sense into the man.

“Dude he ain’t gonna hear me… that castle is huge! There’s no way he could.”

_-inside of evil castle-_

“Princess loud mouth was that you speaking a moment ago?” Hawk Moth shouted up the stairs to the tower.

“No, your just imagining things ya old man!” Her muffled voice sounded from above.

“I could have sworn I heard something… strange.” The dark sorcerer mumbled to himself as he walked back down the hall.

_-back across the hottest bridge ever_

_(cus lava be fire burning)-_

“Nope, no way he could.”

The pair continued across the bridge as Nino tried in vain to fan himself off from the intense heat. Sir Jason then proceeded to Sparta kick the front door open, which only worked because it was unlocked.

“Ok young bumbling fool, we must go forth and secure thy Princess before thy satanic devil beast locates thou and proceeds to chomp on thy liver.”

“So basically, find the Princess and avoid the hell cat or else he’ll eat us, ok got it my dude.” Sir Jason rolled at his squire’s simplicity.

“TALLY HO-oh! Oh no…..” Sir Jason seemed to have been thunder bolted by a certain dark wizard while he was in the middle of his battle cry. He is now dead (unfortunately no one cares, not even the author who is too lazy to give such a worthless character a proper death scene).

Oh well, as they say, the show must go on.

It was down to Nino now. Staring down the sorcerer, he knew there was only one way to defeat this evil menace and enter the tower (because logically that is where all villainous scum keeps their stolen Princesses).

He needed to end him _rightly_.

Dashing to the side Nino avoided the crackling dark magic that Hawk Moth emitted from his fingertips, Nino leaped over the table on the other side of the room and pushed it up to create a temporary shield as he crouched behind it. Quickly he unsheathed his sword and began the tedious task of unscrewing the pommel.

The table withstood a few blows from the wizard’s magic but it couldn’t take much more. Nino rose to his feet once again and sprinted around the room, weaving back and forth as he finally removed the pommel. Turning on his heel, Nino pulled his arm back and threw it with all his might, hitting Hawky smack dab on his forehead.

In his confused state of ‘what just happened’, Hawk Moth’s rapid firing ceased for a moment. Nino took this opportunity to lunge forward and pierce his side with the blade of his sword. The metal weapon easily tore through his wizard robes.

“So much for aesthetic you butterfly bastard. Wearing those flimsy robes instead of armor was your downfall.”

“NOOOOOOOoooooo…..” Hawk Moth screamed as he collapsed dramatically on the floor. He was such a drama queen.

Yeah Nino’s just gonna storm the tower now so bye.

_-approximately 7 flights of stairs later-_

Nino burst through the door to the Princess’ chambers breathing heavily as he bent over to rest his hands on his knees, gasping for air. Whose good idea was it to have so many stairs? Oh, that’s right the aesthetic obsessed wizard.

“Well it took you long enough, my hero.” Alya fluttered her eyelashes at him then proceeded to gage. Yup this was defiantly her alright, no other Princess is this feisty.

“I’m *wheeze* here to *gasp* rescue you, *gasp* god I hate stairs.” Nino looked up to see her smirk at him. “Damn, *gasp* that’s a cool *wheeze* window.”

“Come on Romeo, I want to go back home and away from this place. Seriously this place hasn’t been cleaned since I got here, and I don’t think it ever has.” She shivered at the thought then grabbed Nino’s hand and dragged back down the stairs. God, he hates stairs.

_-back in the main hallway, after so many stairs-_

They were in the home stretch! All he had to do was escape this dust trap of a mansion, get on Sir Jason’s former stallion with the Princess, and ride off into the sunset. And that’s when he heard it. The loud scraping of claws against the stone tiles. The two turned to see piercing green eyes illuminate the darkness as the beast of destruction neared.

Alya didn’t seemed phased at all at the sight of the monster but Nino was moments away from peeing himself under the gaze of such a powerful beast. He already used his pommel, how was he supposed to win this fight let alone end him rightly?

Suddenly the beast charged forward and Nino did what any sensible person would do. He turned and ran screaming about how he doesn’t want to lose his liver. Unfortunately for our young squire, he can’t out run a cat the size of a horse (it’s sort of like how a human can’t race a panther and expect to win, different circumstances, same logic). Nino promptly gets tackled causing him to release the most girly scream he ever heard. His eyes scrunched closed as he anticipated the sharp fangs of the beast to rip him apart.

Instead he is met with the rough sensation of a tough licking his face. Opening his eyes, he sees that he is apparently being cleaned by a rather large and affectionate house cat. He did not expect that at all. In the background, he can hear one very amused Alya laughing her ass off about him screaming like a girl, and in all honesty, he deserved it. Rolling his eyes, Nino accepted his fate of being a familiar’s teddy bear as the cat wrapped its self around him.

_-And they all lived happily ever… WAIT A MINUTE!-_

A bit of closure for all of you. After the adventure Nino got to marry the Princess Alya as reward for saving her and returning the witch Ladybug’s familiar to her. Chat and Lady’s tearful reunion left many in the kingdom with warm hearts as the witch broke Hawk Moth’s curse, turning him back into the Cat Sith he once was (which are basically like cat wizards or something). The two remained friends with the future King and Queen and went on many more adventures together, much to Nino’s never-ending heart attack (seriously though watching your wife almost get eaten by a giant spider is what he would call nightmare fuel).

But in the end, it all worked out, so I guess you could say that…

_-They live happily ever after…-_

 

 

 

 


End file.
